The power to eat anything you like and still be fat.

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To have the abilities to almost be as powerful as God, but you're an existentialist.

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The power to peak braille

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The power to manipulate time and space to urinate straight into your bladder, but only if you are extremely dehydrated.

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The power to come up with useless power while you could be doing something literally ANYTHING else

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The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

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The power to divide by 0

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The ability to dissolve your own organs. They don't grow back, either.

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The power to shit someone elses pants.

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The ability to make your fingernails grow an inch whenever you like, but only on a Tuesday

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The power to laugh in the face of danger except for that time you walked face first into a glass door.

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The power to move infinitely fast up spiral staircases, but the inability to go down them.

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The ability to throw your hat up in the air and have it stay stuck up there in mid-air. We're gonna make it afterall.

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The power to see through walls but only if they're clear glass walls.

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The ability to perfectly feign death for 10 days (no less), then wake up in a very small place.

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The ability to say "MISSING FINGERS" on Shitbrix.com

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The ability to turn incredibly ugly in a beauty padgent

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the ability to sing like t-pain without the autotune

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To be immune to every 37th bullet that hits you.

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The power to return to life but only after being ritually buried 6ft underground

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The power to move any object, but you're blind

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The power to uncontrollably say a pun every sentence during funerals

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The power to have a blue, silhouetted body, and a trollface for a head.

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the power to never get spam

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!