the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

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The power to autocorrect your mom.

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The power to think about a location and forget that you travelled all the way there, making you think you can teleport.

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The power to fall down stairs sooner than you should have.

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the power to ejaculate lava.

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The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

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The power to grow your pinkie toe to ten times its actual length, but only while your shoes are on.

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the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

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The power to jump over a sheep when you turn 10 years old

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the power to attract flying frisbees to your own nose

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The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

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The power to laugh at other people when they get hurt, and still be able to have high esteem in front of all your friends.

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the ability to wake up on an elephant

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the power to walk an inch above land but only on labor day

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The power to shit without squinting.

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ability to run very fast forever

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The power to turn on a hot flash, but only when it's 80 degrees out.

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The superpower to detect when someone is racist.

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The power to turn on a hot flash, but only when it's 80 degrees out.

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Smell chick peas from over two miles away

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The power to switch genders, but you can't switch back.

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the power to eat out your but and poop out your mouth

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the power to eat with your butt

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The power to say WACKY WAVING INFLATABLE ARM FLAILING TUBE MAN - but only at peoples funerals or when taking a piss (but you uncontrolably flail your arms).

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!