the power to jizz money

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The power to make something slightly sticky. Like after you each a juicy piece of fruit. You make everything feel like that.

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the power to get married

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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The power to play a snippet of Darude-Sandstorm whenever you inhale or exhale.

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the power to be blind, but only if you're blind

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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The power to perform stan up comedy whilst sitting down

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The power to die everytime you pee

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The power to telepathically open umbrellas, only open and only umbrellas.

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The ability to be smart, but only if you study for the first 18 years of your life

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The power to laugh when you tickle your feet

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Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

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el poder de escribir en español ( pero solo si naciste en argentina) - ( the power to write in spanish - but only if you are from argentina-)

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The power to defy gravity, but only for the fraction of a second.

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The power to read a book in 2 seconds but forget everything but the title.

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The power to paint with all the colors of the wind!

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The power to be Chuck Norris's bitch.

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the ability to an app cost 1 cent less (no free apps don't count

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The power to know what you're going to have for dinner on any given day 10 years from now.

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The power to have hindsight.

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The power to party like it is 1999 despite it being 2011

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the power to poop dogs without fur.

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The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!