The power to change place with any famous boxer everytime he gets hit. Moral: Hate me, love me... in the end you cannot hate what you do not care about do you? Remember this, when someone hates you, its simply because they care and worry about you... probably the only moral that makes sense... life is beautiful, thank you haters, thank you lovers, and you know what they say... haters gonna hate... they are all just a fluffy bunch of people that care too much :)

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The power to cook pop tarts really fast

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The power to do anything else but worship me. Moral: I DEMAND SATISFACTION! I mean I dont need it, I just want you to do something useful with your life for once... That practically makes me into a saint... Aww.... Steve Jobs No More... LOOOOOOOLLLIPOP!

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The power to not get shit dick

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

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The power to grow your fingernails at 1.5% times the average speed, provided you contribute three hours a day to meditation.

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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The power to run light speed only when the world is speed up to light speed

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The power to type some incredibly perverted "superpowers" and get a boner while laughing so loud the neighbors on both sides of your apartment closed their windows.

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The ability to fly for 14 seconds every decade.

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the power to create carbon dioxide (its the stuff you breathe out)

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The power to shapeshift into a frog, but not the power to turn back

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the power to dissaper into nothingness and appear in 2 years again while not noticing you skipped time...

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The useless power to write about useless powers...

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The power to make bananas appear, at the sight of a cobweb..

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The power to blame it on the Boogie

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The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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whenever you want to sleep an anime starts happening in real life

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The Power to be trust by anyone as long as you are saying bullshits.

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The power to kill anyone with your mind, In your imagination.

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The power to have ABSOLUTELY anything you want!... ...As long as that absolutely anything you want happens to be a pile of premium fresh horsecrap... Moral: This made myself lol, so it probably has 16 red thumbs by now YAY!!!!!!!!

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The power to communicate with your own toenail clippings.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!