The power become a kite but not when it's windy

The ability 2 breath underwater, but not above water

The power to be Omnipotent and create a rock too heavy for yourself to lift.

The power to be arrested for crimes you did not commit

The ability to think why does it say write your own when you type it.

the power to kill plants in a desert.

The power to turn into a pebble

The power to poop whenever you want.

The power to jump 3% higher than the average human,

The power to sleep while you're awake.

The power to sing that lame "Tomorrow" song from Annie uncontrollaby on Dec. 21, 2012.

Being able to have diarrhea when every you want.

the ability to summon a jar of marmalade the forces people to commit adultery

The power to move at the speed of ripeness. Moral: Ripeness is actually slightly slower than time, true fact.

The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

Superhuman strength at the expense of being completely paralyzed

The power to have incredible wet orgasms. if you are a man.

The power to be a really good bowler, but only with a bowling ball that has the skull of your dead father embedded in its center.

To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

The power to summon your mom so you can prove she's not as fat as the chav in front of you is saying she is

The power to make water come out of your fingertips in a slow trickle, the way it looks in the shower.

the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

the power to have powers (super strength,speed ,and flight) in a minute only.

The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!