the power to fail at life

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the power to teleport to any place 1 centimeter away.

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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the power to turn into nothing.

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The power to have super hearing but only works when you are dead.

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The power to sh*t bricks

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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The power to smell any mans underwear without getting caught... (works only on straight men)

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the power to be a master carpenter, make anything, except love.

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X ray vision on chairs

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the power to be Justin bieber

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The power to speed up time for only 1 Planck Instant every hour.

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The power to make Macs appear instantly, but be unable to left-click on them.

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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The power to shoot milk through your eyes

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the power to win the crying game

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The ability to find a use for High School Algebra.

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The power to tell when someone is using a cheese grater within 5 feet

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The power to create peanut butter and jelly sandwiches without having any peanut butter.

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Power to freeze ice.

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The ability to turn any escalator into a flight of stairs.

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The power to shoot pieces of cheese from your eyes..

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The power to speak only one language

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the ability to type slower.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!