The ability to read minds by absorbing their mental disorders

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The power to fly.......but only in your underwear.

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

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The power to RISE FROM YOUR GRAVE, only for becoming a homoerotic bodybuilder addicted to steroids made from white bull testicles, and eating so many that you eventually become a golden werewolf, a blue hedgehog or something like that...

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The ability to teleport but you poop your pants whenever you do it even if your not wearing pants

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The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

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To summon a duct tape PEICE for 3 seconds then disappears but you can only do it each century

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The power to see even though you can already see.

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The power to have explosive diarrhea involuntarily but only on dinners with your date and his/her parents.

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The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

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the power of being yourself

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The power to write a moral under each comment. ( Just a thought: when did most of these become superpowers? I mean is women`s period become superpower? And becoming Justin Beiber? A superpower? I need to change my definition...)

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The power to create a clean and temporary bathroom only you can use when you don't have to use one

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The power to shift baroque and rococo era paintings proximately 2" up and 3" to the left.

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The power to count the number of hair on your head.... Backwards!

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The power to have any girl as your girl friend but they turn ugly

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The power to shit 1 penny per every year

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The abiltity to grow an additional 4 fingered hand from your inner thigh

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The power to kill yourself

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To be able to levitate one object in front of you for one second a day

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Moral man. Moral: I have self irony... which isn't a superpower... neither is being me... But its at least Super pointless and I have the power to do this... SO CLOSE! SO DAMN CLOSE! :(

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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The power to fly simular to a paper air plane. OH SHIT BIRD SHIT COMING IN.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!