The power to make dad jokes.

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The ability to not come back to life when you die.

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The power to be 0.00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 seconds younger

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the power to win any shit eating contest.

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the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

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The power to produce sweat when hot.

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the power to get struck by lightning at will.

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the ability to know if a movie is bad or good but only after you have watched it

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Customer: Waiter, there's a fly in my soup! Waiter: I'm terribly sorry sir, please let us replace your soup with a more satisfactory one which is hygienic, and does not contain a dead organism. Customer: Thanks.

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The power to make people believe it wasn't' you who just farted

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the power to go into a coma

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The pewer to become a human bullet magnet. Moral: "DONT WORRY PEOPLE! I SHALL SAVE YOU ALL!" (Well if you want to sacrifice yourself to save them all, then you its useful and you a douchebag)

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The power to be reincarnated as yourself 5 minutes before you die again

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The power to become a carrot.

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The power to have explosive diarrhea after eating Chipotle

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the power to move forward in time one second peer second

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The power to shapeshift into a frog, but not the power to turn back

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The power to stop making up pointless super powers and submiting them on a website called pointless superpowers

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The ability to turn Barack Obama white

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The power to always have the exact amount of money in your pocket when buying something, but then drop and lose a dime when the money over.

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The power to save 16% or more on your auto insurance

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The power to sit down as long as you are not in contact with anything.

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The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

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The power to spit fire only by drinking gas into a flame - Isaac goodall

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!