The ability to fart like a zombie.

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The power to spontaneously combust into trillions of microscopic kittens, every time you stare a cat photo for more then 3 hours.

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The ability to push doors marked "pull"

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The power to open doors that are already open

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The power to be fluent in every language but only when your head is fully submerged underwater.

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The power to transform your appearance so that you look unmistakably like yourself.

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The power to think.

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The power to charge your iPhone if it is not an iPhone

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The power to sleep but only when its past midnight

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The power to breath fire even though you are not fireproof.

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The ability to digest three types of earth elementals

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The power to smell poo...

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The power to date women if they say 'Yes' when you ask if they want to date.

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The power to stop global warming on the planet Neptune.

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The ability to poop glue.

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The power to eat junk food at light speed

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to die

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The power to be anyone you want but your still a nobody

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The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

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Have sex but not feel it

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the abilty to come back to life, but in a black hole.

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The power to absolutely nothing

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the power to frow up when your not sick.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!