?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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the ability to darken darkness

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The power to resist the Facebook status forces.

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The power to make anyone with the exact same genetic makeup as you bleed at a wound if there is a bullet imbedded in their head

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The power to travel in time but only to the moment of your death.

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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The power to close your eyes and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

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The power to use your legs in such a way that you can effectively walk,run or stay still whenever you want.

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The power to read someone's mind, but only if they're thinking of tacos.

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the ability to say "you're killing me", without irony...to my murderer

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The power to walk twice as fast as a guy who walks half the speed you normally have.

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The ability to know everything and get anything you want, but you must poop out a poop the size of a horse.

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The power of flight, but also have vertigo. VertigoMan to the resc Aggh!!!! Please someone get me down. OH GOD!!!! HELP!!!!

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Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

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The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

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The power to shoot 2 inches of artillery cable from your pinkie.

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The power to levitate a lamp 4 inches off the ground... Once...

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The power to make mediocre cabbage soup.

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The power to have anything EVERYTHING you DONT want.

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The Power to rot you favorite food by looking at it

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the power to give anyone an incurable disease

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The power to only be drunk while driving.

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The ability to make all the world's coffee lukewarm.

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the power to not have a power

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!