Possess irresistible pheromones that only work on male razorback gorillas.

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The power to be black.

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i want my mum

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thumb_up thumb_down -368

The power to have any pussy you want but only to magically transform it into a small bloody hairy wrinkled dick with herpes and AIDS when you touch it and there is nothing you can do about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -381

The power to transform coke into pepsi....

thumb_up thumb_down +374

The ability to walk through closed doors, but only when they're unlocked

thumb_up thumb_down +405

the power to, when you put your hand in the shape of a gun, to shoot random objects from your fingers

thumb_up thumb_down +411

The power to rape your mom.

thumb_up thumb_down -560

The ablity to understand the minds of women.

thumb_up thumb_down +221

The power to be extremely slow, (like in matrix slowmotion) but your foes aren't

thumb_up thumb_down +365

The power to know how the book ends after reading the first chapter

thumb_up thumb_down +303

The power to have implosive diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down +274

the ability to obtain a Klondike Bar without doing anything

thumb_up thumb_down +337

the ability to be the best looking guy but only in jail

thumb_up thumb_down +238

the ability to cause people within 20 feet of you to try to imitate the sound of a balloon deflating

thumb_up thumb_down +381

The ability to turn invisible when no ones looking.

thumb_up thumb_down +308

The power to create fire only when totally submerged underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down +341

the powrer too piis blood but u have to piss every 10 minutes

thumb_up thumb_down -223

the power to teleport to the nearest pedophile's bedroom

thumb_up thumb_down +177

The power to make women have their most amazing orgasms, but be hideously disfigured.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The ability to fly at the speed of light, but can never stop.

thumb_up thumb_down +285

The power to talk to slugs but not have them understand what your saying.

thumb_up thumb_down +333

The power to see through glass.

thumb_up thumb_down +375

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!