the power to make body fat go away

thumb_up thumb_down +66

The power fuse yourself with a two lifeless jellyfish use their vital systems

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The power to hear everyone masturbating in 1 km radius

thumb_up thumb_down -38

The power to post the same shit twice.

thumb_up thumb_down +53

The power to walk into sliding glass doors. not through them. just into them.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

The power to turn water into gastrointestinal fluids.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

the ability to fold towels only while they are dirty.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to only be able to prepare foods that require a toaster in a bathtub.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

The power to shit someone elses pants.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

The ability to wear a backpack on your legs

thumb_up thumb_down +1

the power to make your voice sound like a two year old little girl's.

thumb_up thumb_down +226

The power to love but never be loved (a.k.a the story of my life)

thumb_up thumb_down +64

The power to hear the crying of babies when you are trying to fall asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

the power to fly, only when in the cabin of an airplane

thumb_up thumb_down +30

the power to buy a size 11 shoe but needing a 15

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The power of Superuselessnessman

thumb_up thumb_down +2

The ability to immediately gain stage four stomach cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +225

to have a limb drop off every day but it grow back the next

thumb_up thumb_down +189

The power to speak to unicorns, even though they don't exist

thumb_up thumb_down +189

The power to grow two extra arms that are invisible, can't touch anything, and you can't control.

thumb_up thumb_down +153

The ability to inhale carbon dioxide and exhale oxygen.

thumb_up thumb_down +89

The power to fly but only during inclement weather

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to eat just one lays potato chip

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!