The power to never have sex....jack.

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The power to grow cheese but only near a crazy hobo who is lactose intolerant.

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to have the ability to fly and teleport at the same time.

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the ability to be a box of donuts in a police station

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the ability to duct tape an alarm clock to the side of your head

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The power to convince people who already agreed with you.

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thepowertofixmyspacebar.

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The power to see your neighbor without looking.

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The power to hold your breath for one to two minutes.

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the ability to have as much lottery tickets as you want but you cant send them.

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The ability to spend expired coupons.

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the power to unload massive amounts of jizz while taking a dump

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The power to reverse crab walk at extremely high speeds

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the power to jump 10x higher, but are affected by gravity 10x greater

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The power to procrast ....

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The power to always run out of toilet paper when it's needed most.

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The power to teabag bear- traps at will

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The power to have super speed but only when you're wearing tight leather pants.

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the power to shit bicks

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the ability to be the owner of a car with no wheels

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the power to pee straight with a boner

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The power to make hot strippers appear. The catch is that you have less than a second or else they become pedobear.

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the power to speak morse code .

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The Ability to make everybody hate YOU!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!