The power to bleed out of your nose all the tme.

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the ability to shoot a little steam cloud from your penis every time you finish peeing

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The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

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The power to never have fun...never.

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The power to sneeze out of your mouth and cough out of your nose.

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The power to turn in to a weak 1 year old

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The power that will grant you no power.

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the power to go "heh heheh heh perverted"

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The power to become the worlds most famous necrophilia pørnstar after dying.

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The ability to make yourself rich unless you are using it on yourself...

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the power to sleep with any woman, unless your a man

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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The power to type useless powers that no one's ever gonna read.

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the power to allow dumbass powers to be written on this site

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The power to not move but your always happy.

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The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

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The power to read the minds of sandwhiches.

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the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

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the power to be powerless

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the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

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The power to have razor sharp facial hair.

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the power to teleport but then immediatly cr@p your pants

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Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

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The power to be afraid of movies that are not scary

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!