ability to smack the crap out of austin calhounh and laugh at him

The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

Most of Gods powers part 2: Let us pretend that God really created everything... including sin right? God: Jebus, I want you to go down to earth and receive torture of legendary proportions, and die. Jebus: Why? God: To remove sin... Jebus: Uh... cant you just remove it? God replies either: 1. Yeah but ill be more fun this way, ill have you killed just to show you are not mortal anyways lol troll! 2. No, Sin is more powerful than me, so you better go die to not really die, relax... 3. Son, my ways are mysterious, "thunderstorm scares Jebus to go down) Moral disclaimer: God can be anyone`s God, and Jebus is not to be confused with the completely different Jesus. I mean every God out there and Jebus is simply a name I put instead of whoever prophet your religion has, so I really insulted everyone religious. Moral: (the other was a disclaimer) Religion is written by men... drunk men... now go eat your bread and drink your wine... and you shall become like Jebus... tortured and crucified? To show the world you are immortal? Side effects: Alcholism and all that follows, including a quicker death... to prove your immortality? (Hypnosis is powerful shit, especially when you are drunk, take it from a experienced hypnotist)

The Power To Make Justin Bieber.

The power to do a hand stand with your feet

The power to make police appear whilst speeding.

To never remember what the word if means

The power to think of food

The power to have a invisible boat mobile

The power to kill you self.

the power to walk on walls but not on the floor

mint berry crunch

The power to run super fast, but only while in space.

The power to see through womens clothes, but your gay.

The power to smell any point in time

The power to jerk off with no hands.

The power to creat your own superpower that's by the way. POINTLESS

The power to survive jumping form a plane as long as you have a parachute.

The power to see through things that are invisible.

The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

The power to be out of the kitchen... and a woman

The power to obey gravity

The power of being negative all the time.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!