The power to be a dog, with Herpes, that smells like farts.

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The power to travel back and forth in time by pressing your left elbow against your right armpit. It really works! Try it!

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The power to make lipstick fly

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The power to see through womens clothes, but your gay.

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The power of hindsight

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The power to create a vaporization beam that removes one atom per second.

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The power to envision 1 possible death scenario for any person you look at.

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The power to eat carrot cake, then die 12 seconds

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The power to continuously and periodically turn oxygen into carbon dioxide using magic organs in your chest by sucking the the atmosphere through your mouth.

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The ability to "Right Click" Properties

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The power to melt plastic by standing perfectly still for a month.

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The power to defuse bombs without touching them, but you have to be within 3 inches of it.

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The power to live forever until you die a natural way or get killed.

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The power to have YMCA or "In the navy" play explosively loudly from your nostrils and be immune to it yourself. Moral: WE KNOW YOU ARE H0MOSEXUAL ALREADY! TURN THAT SHIT OFF!

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the power to understand what kate bush is singing

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The power to swim as fast as Sonic The Hedgehog

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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.sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop ehT

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The power to fart in public AT WILL..

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The power to get hurt without a break.

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The ability for your penis to tie itself into a knot.

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The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

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The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

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The power to have bad breath after you brushed your teeth.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!