- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability to change a light bulb with the help of a friend on the first or fourth Tuesday of every 4 four months when he has enough free time to help.

the ability to say either "beans are magical!" or "beans are fruit!" in an angry tone, and have people believe you

The power to lick your elbow.

The power to read 1.2x faster than the average person.

thw power to not feel anything during sex unless you dont like the sex (ie rape, ugly fat pearson)

The power to see...oh i'm so wasted i forgot what i was going to type!

the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

See the answers to any question inside your head while suffering from severe dyslexia.

The super power to kill yourself at will

The power to rip open my shirt to show a s t-shirt

The left part of your body is fireproof but the right side is not

The power to teleport to Northern Siberia with only a speedo on.

Supreme pre-mature ejaculation.

to be able to lift any weight of feathers

The power to see at night but only black objects.

The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

The power to make money disappear.

To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

The power to drink dihydrogen monoxide without dying.

The power to switch genders, but you can't switch back.

the ability to wake up on an elephant

the power to produce shampoo out your eyes

th eability to have sex with anyone in the world but have to have sex with rosie o'donnell first

The power to remember anyone's birthday unless you are at their birthday party.

Pointless Super Powers