the power to live a happy and fullfilling life...

To be able to summon old people

the power to sing like a pro but only when in a bathroom or when autotune is involved...

The power to turn computers into pencil sharpeners.

The power to shape shift into water

The power to see through air.

the power to travel through time... at the speed of normal time.

The power to live again but only while your still alive.

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

The power to travel forward in time at the speed of normal time.

the power to kill plants in a desert.

The powers of findinf Waldo everywhere but in his books

The power of extreme superstrenght, you scratch you`re nuts and planet earth explodes from the vibrations.

The power to find anything on google. EXCEPT PORN.

The power of 2 milliseconds of omnipotence followed by death.

The power to use the english language to grammatical perfection. er, ferpection.

The Pickle Touch- That is, the power to pickle any object by merely touching it.

The power to be a walrus

The power to have wood when you wake up.

The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

The power to start time.

the power two peel m&ms -jesse

The power to shoot string cheese out of your fingers.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!