the power to feel extreme pain

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The power to kiss my mom' s ass from long distances

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The power to appear in the center of the moon (in a hollow space) whenever you die.

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The power to eat just 1 Lays potato chip

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The power to speak Spanish, but only to people who do not speak Spanish.

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the power to think 0.0000000000000001 microseconds faster than usual

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The power to kick ass and chew bubblegum but be all out of kicks. "sits down chews bubblegum"

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the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

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The power to spell backwards.

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The power to eat turkey with nothing more than your mouth.

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The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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The power to instantly ressurect at the very same spot if you get submerged under lava or acid.

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The power to have YMCA or "In the navy" play explosively loudly from your nostrils and be immune to it yourself. Moral: WE KNOW YOU ARE H0MOSEXUAL ALREADY! TURN THAT SHIT OFF!

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the power to get really mad.

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Ability to become friends with anyone, but only on facebook

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The power to make rain stop, only on sunny days.

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Th power to be telepathetic

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The power to poop out your penis.

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the power to give anyone an incurable disease

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the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

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the power to change the size of your thumb when ever you want

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The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

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The power to use expired coupons, this Power expired 3 years ago

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The power to always know which way North is but you forget where you are.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!