The power to have a poo at your girlfriend's house and be only 22.2% sure that it will flush

thumb_up thumb_down -25

the power of spontaneous combustion but only when you get an erection

thumb_up thumb_down -31

The power to talk to talking animals.

thumb_up thumb_down +192

The power to seduce any woman... that weighs over 300 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +180

The ability to regrow 1 strand of hair every 2 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +150

The ability to give yourself brain cancer at will

thumb_up thumb_down +114

Swiss army teeth.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to take away your power.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to fly, but you have to wee every 5 seconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +86

Ability to make your eyes switch sockets

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to travel to a parallel universe where everyone who exists dies every .1 milliseconds.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to forget what you were going to say

thumb_up thumb_down +74

The power to still have 0.01 percent of germs on your hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The power to see through windows!

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The power to live through a Twilight movie.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

alarm that goes off when hiding

thumb_up thumb_down +48

the power to evenly cook a hot pocket.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

the power to save Chinese people... who needs um?

thumb_up thumb_down +44

The power of eating from ears.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to come back to life just by yelling: I LIVE AGAIN! Or RESURRECTION! (which is not easy when you are dead)

thumb_up thumb_down +30

The power to turn into wood by rubbing salt on yourself

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The power to turn expensive drinks into shit flavored milk

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The uncontrollable ability to turn oncomming vehicles headlights on. But only at night, when you are passing them.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

the ability to fly through the sky using the skin from your ballsack to glide to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!