Super speed, but with super clumsiness

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The power to unravel the toilet-paper towards you.

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Expert level knowledge of the Kardashian lore

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The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

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the power to shape shift to yourself

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The power of flight but only when you're within three feet of another person.

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The power to knock yourself unconscious

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The ability to fall unconscious at will.

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The power to drink alcohol without getting drunk.

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The powre to speel thengs wrong but put things in the right order

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The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

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the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

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the power to act exatctly like a pineaplle.

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An ability to exist without any food but only after you eat some food.

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The power to fart out of your mouth

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The ability to change Celsius to Farenheit.

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The ability to invent a new language that no one else will ever learn.

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the power to misspell

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The power of having useless wings grow on your testicles

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the power to stare at someone without blinking or smiling for ever

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The ability to switch out elevator music with NPR

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The power to control Rollie pollies

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The power to eat razorblades, but only when covered in a mixture of antifreeze, bile and tabasco sauce.

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The power to make any woman sleep with you. but works only on dead ones.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!