- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to explode by yelling ALLAH FORGIVE MEEEEEEEEEE! (Bonus: you always appear on Al Jazeera when you blow yourself up)

The power of immortality, but only when you try to commit suicide.

The power to simply walk into mordor.

the power die if you think.

The power to flush toilets with your mind

The ability to cure someone of HIV, but you contract it yourself.

the power to fly but only if you keep both feet firmly on the ground

the power make tomatoes turn green.

Ability to be Stephen Hawking's stunt double.

Expert level knowledge of the Kardashian lore

The power to teleport to any 3rd world country

The power to look through glass.

the power to at will swap your hands and feet around... you fall over every time

The power to fall asleep at will. But it's only active when you're asleep.

the power to not finish your

To be able to run the speed of light but only works if your standing still?.

The power to not have any powers

The power to fight your way out of a wet paper bag.

The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

The ability to excrete Hydrochloric acid, but only in your stomach.

The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

The power to give epic blowjobs, works only if you are a incarcerated, straight male.

the ability to un-dank any meme

the power to see the things that are happening right

Pointless Super Powers