the power to turn retarted

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The power to know the answer to every question you're asked, but forgetting it instantly.

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the power to walk on land.

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to be one second faster than 5mph in any 80's arcade game using one finger to push the buttons

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Qu1. Why is Steven Hawking so smart A. Because he's half robot. Qu.2. Why is Albert Einstein so smart A. He got forced to try things.

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The power to menstruate from your eyes.

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the power to turn into a tree

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The power to listen to Meghan Straight talk

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The power to jump 1 inch higher.

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The power to make police appear whilst speeding.

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The Power To Lick My Own Penis

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The power to make somebody fall in love with anybody who isn't you.

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The power to still believe in Santa Clause.

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The power to instantly make an accurate assessment on tomorrow's hangover probability well before you've consumed far more than the amount of alcohol which would guarantee it...and yet manage to forget sometimes you have this superpower.

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The power to make any single girl instantly reach for her Mace.

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the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

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The power to sense the emotions of inanimate objects.

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the power to predict Justin Beiber's next album

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The power to fly but only when your eyes are closed.

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The power to never need to eat, unless you are hungry.

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The power to shoot billions of neutrinos from your hands at an enemy.

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The ability to do moderately well on an exam while sharting next to your crush.

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The power to become invisible, only when no one is looking at you.

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The power of reading a book unless it has 3 or more pages.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!