The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

The power to fly but only when your feet are on the ground

The power to see your reflection with The Mirror

The ability to catch bullets traveling under 5 mph

The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

the power to sleep while standing!

The power to become perfect. Perfect: There can be only one moral man.

The power to have tastebuds inside your ass.

The ability to transform yourself in to a vibrator that is about to be used. Only works if you are gay.

The power to science.

The power to die whenever you eat any type of food

The power to control Rollie pollies

the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

The power to make a woman be quiet but only during sex.

You're super strong, but only when punching SUV's.

The power to have excellent wifi when all your devices are dead.

the ability to discern homophobic, racist, and mysoginistic posts on this site from the actually ok ones.. oh wait this is useful STOP BEING A JACKASS

The ability to tolerate listening to Nick Cannon's albums.

The power to make your breath smell like vanilla at will.

The power to make up pointless superpowers

the power to emit free wifi which the signal strength varies by your erection.

the power to turn into amy rose

The ability to turn cement into pudding

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!