the ability to predict the winning lottery numbers in a completely random order

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The power to walk through floors and fall through walls

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The power to turn back the clock at will. Not time, just clocks.

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The ability to see through insects.

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The ability to ingest Dihydrogen-monoxide and survive.

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The power to ride a unicorn without a horn that can't fly.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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Reversed telepathy, everyone can hear your thoughts.

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The power to Insult people by accidentally saying something you didn't know was offensive to them. You adopted jew

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The power to automatically yell every action you do like in a Japanese fighting game, I once started doing this for fun, at the end of the day eveyone hated me, good luck. (OPEN DOOR! OPEN DOOR! CLOSE DOOR! POOL SHOT! CUMMING HARD CUMMING HARD! SONIC BOOM! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! BEING TOLD TO SHUT UP! TAKING A PUNCH TO THE FACE UPPERCUT!)

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The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

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The power to be able to see words backwards, but not any faster than the average mentally handicapped person can read backwards.

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The power to excel at something that nobody cares about.

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The power to play Call of Duty for free, if you've already bought the game not for free.

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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The power to stop time whenever you get stabbed in the liver

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The ability to turn on lamps through doors when it's bright.

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The power to fly.......but only in your underwear.

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Invisibility when people aren't looking.

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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore

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the ability to produce petrol from your ankles but only when you're on fire.

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The power to eat nails and crap broken glass.

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The power to sleep on road trips but only if you're not in a car.

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The power of hearing peoples conversations but only on topics related to Shrek.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!