The power of turning into a crushed can right after you got into a car accident.

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The power to read the bible, and then learn hypnosis, and look at the bible again... Moral: And they say hypnosis is worthless because it is just suggestions... the bible uses EVERY single trick in the book, and the bible`s teaching lead to the "holy" crusades (of kill murder and rape across the world, too many died to count), the bigotry, greater intolerance to different people, and just now (Bush before him) Obama is assuring his people that this war is "GODS WILL!" And seriously, if darkness is considered evil... then no wonder Captain America and his men did not hesitate to kill and enslave Captain Africa and his people a couple years ago... And its still going on, thanks lord (sarcasm, duh) Suggestion: Most powerful force in the universe, and it is invisible to boot... daaaang im powerful.

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The power to turn on your tv with your mind as long as the remote is in your hand and has batteries.

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The power to run as fast as a snail.

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To grow your fingernails out and in very quickly.

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the power to be forever alone

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The power to actually ENJOY Dora the Explorer.

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The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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The powr to spell eviting wrong.

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The power to read any captcha, but no longer be able to type.

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The ability to sleep but only when you don't want to

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X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

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The ability to sit on air, provided you are in space.

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The power to fart out of your hands.

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The power to throw fireballs only under water

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The power to Grow a baby in a woman.... for 9 months.

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The power to shovel well. To shovel very well.

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The power to build Lego with incredible speed, but then knock it down immediately.

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The ability to fly up 3feet travel to travel a meter forwards

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The ability to push "pull" doors, and pull "push" doors.

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The power to turn everything you touch in to a plastic fork.

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The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

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the power to kill plants in a desert.

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The power to wear comfortably wear shoes that are way too small.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!