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Pointless Super Powers

 

The uncontrollable ability to turn oncomming vehicles headlights on. But only at night, when you are passing them.

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The power to see your neighbor without looking.

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The power of throwing back grenades

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The ability to unbleep swear words on your tv.

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the power to say i can bend you

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the power to projectile vomit every time you attempt to laugh.

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The power to understand irony.

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Being able to make sandwiches, but you're a man.

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The Power to beat a Mairo game

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The ability to get anyone answer your messages when the answer starts: What the...

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The power to have no powers

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

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Quotes From Other Sites

  • “If i could rearrange the alphabet, id violate your ass hole..”

    via: Anti-Pickup Line

  • “I'm not Just the Iron In Yard, I'm a Member.”

    via: Clarksonisms

  • “A Black Cat..”

    via: Pointless Inventions

  • “wonder how old the people r who right these. im 12.”

    via: Things You Think Only You Do

    • ©2008-2011 Pointless Super Powers. All rights reserved.
    A Horse Head Huffer Production.

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